


felicity

by fiveyaaas



Series: when autumn comes [33]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Begging, Dark Comedy, F/M, Kinda, Roleplay, Sexual Humor, Sexual Roleplay, Vaginal Fingering
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-10
Updated: 2020-11-10
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:08:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,024
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27497710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fiveyaaas/pseuds/fiveyaaas
Summary: Vanya had struggled so much, trying to figure out what to do for their first time celebrating their birthday together as a couple, that she’d gone to him, straight-up asking him what he wanted. Expecting a sappy response like ‘I already have everything I want’ like he’d given sometimes before with questions like that, he instead had told her with a disturbing grin (he had learned how to smile from a chimp, after all), ‘I have an idea.’
Relationships: Number Five | The Boy/Vanya Hargreeves
Series: when autumn comes [33]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1941919
Comments: 3
Kudos: 48
Collections: Harcest Fall Festival: Fiveya Kinktober 2020





	felicity

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Jazzydemons666](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jazzydemons666/gifts).



“Alright, this might be too weird for me.” 

Five frowns up at her as she says it, like he’s somehow flummoxed by her words, like it’s a perfectly ordinary request of one’s partner to dress up like Marilyn Monroe and sing happy birthday to them as some sort of sex thing. “What’s so weird about it?” 

“The wig, for one.”

“Oh, you can take that off then.”

Vanya purses her lips, “Okay, fine, the singing.”

“An essential part, I’m afraid.”

“Five, this is  _ weird.” _

“Why?”

A frustrated noise escapes her mouth, “It’s  _ weird,  _ and it’ll hardly be  _ sexy _ to hear the shame in my voice.”

“I dunno, the shame might do something for me too.”

_ “Five!”  _

“I’m only speaking the truth, dear.” 

Vanya groans, “The worst part is that I’m 90% certain you’ve somehow managed to steal the  _ actual  _ dress from sometime in the Commission and had it tailored to fit me. That this was entirely premeditated, somehow.”

“Oh, yeah, that’s all true!” 

She whimpers, imagining a life with some normal person who didn’t steal from Marilyn Monroe’s sex wardrobe. 

It would probably have been a super boring life, though.

“Okay, fine. I’ll make a compromise. I take off the wig, but I do everything else in this disturbingly detailed play-by-play you typed up.” When she’d gotten the “memo” this morning, along with what was apparently Marilyn Monroe’s dress and 1960’s vintage lingerie, her eyes had nearly bulged from their sockets. Vanya had struggled so much, trying to figure out what to do for their first time celebrating their birthday together as a couple, that she’d gone to him, straight-up asking him what he wanted. Expecting a sappy response like ‘I already have everything I want’ like he’d given sometimes before with questions like that, he instead had told her with a disturbing grin (he had learned how to smile from a chimp, after all), ‘I have an idea.’ 

“That’s fine,” Five says, leaning back against his armchair with that same grin, holding onto a glass of whiskey. (It was feeling more and more like some sort of unaired, NC-17 episode of  _ Mad Men,  _ and she seriously should not  _ actually  _ be turned on by him in what was very likely an assassinated president’s suit.) 

“This is weird,” she repeats. 

“You once asked me to name off every person I killed when you were going down on me. You have  _ no  _ room to talk.”

Vanya frowns at him, nearly pouting, and he sighs, loudly and exasperatedly, “Fine, your kinks are totally normal and everybody should have them. Happy?”

Not liking the smug way he’s looking at her, she finds herself singing to him, in the style of Marilyn Monroe. His mouth drops, aghast that she’d actually been able to do it, apparently. Vanya takes pride in how the velvety and sultry quality she’s singing is already affecting him, seeing him growing hard as she continues, pressing her thighs together in frustration. She wants to climb on top of him, sit on his lap and listen to him praise her for doing a good job, but he doesn’t want her to stop, he’s  _ begging _ her not to stop. 

They both are affected by this, which is unfortunate because she’d wanted to be able to shame him for having such an abnormally specific fetish, but she can’t now if she doesn’t want to be a hypocrite. Vanya’s legs are starting to shake, wanting nothing more than for him to touch her, and she wonders if he’ll make her sing for hours. If he’ll wait until her voice is hoarse from strain and not desire. The thought of it makes her tremble more, and she wrings her fingers together, trying to distract herself from the urge to step forward. His mouth is agape, and she glances down just a second, whimpering at what she sees and focusing back on his eyes. 

It feels like they’re playing a game- to see who would break first. And as much as she’d been equal parts horrified and amused when she’d read through his plans this morning, she knows that she’s somehow roped herself into this kink too. There’s something wonderful, too, about knowing that she’d spend the rest of her life with him, that she wasn’t going to have to explain this to someone else to try it again, that this was (sadly) likely to become something they did every year. 

Finally, he breaks, weakly asking her to come to him. She thinks he’d probably intended something much more commanding, like beckoning, when he’d first planned this scenario. He is clearly even more affected than he’d thought he would’ve been, dazedly wrapping his arms around her as she settles onto his lap. Vanya realizes that she’s going to have to take what she is wearing off, knowing he likely  _ would  _ time travel to bring it back if it broke and knowing she couldn’t condone that behavior. When she disentangles from him, he whimpers, already reaching for her, but she chides him softly, taking off the dress carefully. She doesn’t worry about the lingerie, knowing it was likely just some he’d actually bought in the 60’s at some point. 

As she climbs back on top of him, he presses his lips to hers. Vanya grinds against his leg, and he reaches down, running his finger over her panties. “Fuck, you’re soaked,” he grunts, not pulling the underwear off yet, likely taking some sort of pleasure in feeling the dampness that had seeped through. 

“It’s still weird,” she mutters, but his smirk informs her that he knows she’s just trying to protest to save face at this point. 

“It  _ is,”  _ she insists, trying to angle herself to where he’s touching her again. It doesn’t work, and she realizes he’s going to make her admit that she enjoyed herself before he does anything else. “I’m not going to tell you it’s not weird.” Even though her tone is resolute, she knows she absolutely will if she has to.

But she has a few tricks up her sleeve as well, and, when she starts singing again, she knows he’ll be the one to break first. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! There will be two fics that follow this, but they’re not from the actual kinktober prompts!


End file.
